“Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who YOU are”

-Wayne Dyer

This is very self-explanatory

I honestly hate it when people judge others based on how they look, their appearance, physique…everything on the ‘outside’.
No one is perfect and making fun of others won’t change the way they look, so why do we still do it?

Why do we make people feel bad about themselves? Why do we constantly tear down the self-esteem of others? Why do we judge others when we are a thousand steps away from perfection? Why do we laugh at someone else’s flaw(s) when we secretly have ours?

Why do we do all these things?

“Do not judge appearances, a rich heart may be under a poor coat”

Recent studies have shown that people judge because they are:

  • Low-key insecure about something related
  • Self-conscious and feel that laughing at others will make things better
  • Just really mean and silly

These are not good enough reasons to put any one down or make them feel horrible about themselves (maybe even worse than they already feel).

Something I learnt a while back was that if you can’t change a flaw in someone, don’t laugh about it. This is as easy as it gets.

Note that in the second paragraph I used ‘we‘ rather than ‘you‘ because we are all, including me, guilty of this at one point or the other. Sometimes we give nasty remarks at the first sight of a person like “wow, his nose is so large he could probably suck in all the oxygen available ” or “why does she wear those shorts? Her legs are not to be seen” or maybe even something as little as “why are their teeth so big?” And this happens Β without initial thought but that’s the problem-we don’t think before we say things.

A wise person once said “If only Closed Minds came with Closed Mouths.”

And that’s the truth.

We need to think about how what we say will affect others. We hear about suicide more often in recent times and most times it’s caused by bullying and low self esteem. You don’t have to beat someone physically to become a bully, a mean word to someone is also a punch to the heart.

Your words should build up, not break down.

Your words should inspire, not devalue.

Your words should encourage, not discourage.

Everyone is different the same way every puzzle piece is unique but we all play an important part in life. So next time before writing someone out because of how they look, get to know them because they might have so much more to offer.

When people die, people rarely mention their good looks or flawless skin or designer products, what they remember is the mark you left in their lives.

What do you want people to say about you at the end?

Make it positive.

Dumebi x


21 thoughts on “Why Judge?

  1. Wow dumebi this is very inspiring. I am a victim of being jugded but i never let it get to me. I would always laugh about it or soometimes get angry but it never brought down my self esteem. God bless you and i can see that you have gone far already.love you loadsπŸ’–πŸ’–

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nice one bud πŸ˜‰
    Though I do agree with not judging people (I’ve been hurt bad by it so I know the feels), I’ve come to a realization of my own where I see that it’s a human nature thing. We WILL judge people somehow. Even for myself, I TRAIN myself FOR YEARS to not judge people because I know its effects firsthand and I still catch myself doing it at times- Which brought me to a new conclusion:

    “You can judge all you want but keep it to yourself. The world doesn’t need to know lol!”

    I truly believe that unless you’ve ascended humanity and become Mother Teresa, judging will forever be a part of us and we’ll need to learn how to manage that side of us. Just my view on it now anyway lol.

    Keep up the good work bud!

    Your pal,

    Liked by 1 person

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